A Word in Season

The little family was struggling. Three growing boys, transport, medical fees, home schooling, and one smallish income; the sums just weren't adding up. Each month they would have to juggle bills and relinquish hoped-for treats in order to make ends meet. But they were followers of Jesus and their home church was very strict on the need to tithe, meaning to give a tenth of their gross income to the Lord's work. Taking a tenth out before tax was a big whack, but the couple never questioned the convention; this was their Christian duty.

Stress built up, conflicts and criticisms burgeoned, and eventually they went for marriage advice to a skilled Christian counsellor. After listening to their story, he astonished them by saying very firmly "You need to stop tithing." I won't go into his reasons here, but to this couple it was a word from God. It brought freedom and hope. They needed permission to release this false goal and bring their finances under the Spirit's control, the Spirit of whom it is said, "Where the Spirit of the Lord is, is freedom," not legalism and guilt. This wise man saw that the practice of "tithing on the gross" was not appropriate for their particular circumstances, and was prompted to speak a strong 'Word of God' to them.

I remembered this pastoral experience this week as I prepared a sermon on the Fifth Commandment, the one that tells us to 'Honour our father and our mother, that our days may be long....." It was an opportunity to remind the good folk of our faith community about the 600 laws in the Hebrew Torah, most of which are casuistic laws which do not apply to followers of Jesus.An example I gave was the rule in Deuteronomy about building a parapet on your roof. Some laws however are apodictic laws, which state general principles of faith and ethics, and these include the Ten Commandments of Exodus 20, which we have studies over recent weeks. These were affirmed and summarised by Jesus into the two great commandments "Love God with all your heart and soul and mind and strength," and "Love your neighbour as you love yourself." So, as a general rule, Christians expect that their daily life will be lived in accordance with these ten historic principles, dating back three thousand years.

However, as with all Scripture, it is too simplistic and in some cases downright dangerous to apply a literal interpretation without doing some hermeneutical homework, that is by understanding and interpreting the laws into one's own context. Gordon Fee once wrote, "The Old Testament is God's Word for us a but not always God's Word to us." In some places in the world, not making a graven image (Exodus 20: 2) means something very similar to what it meant to the ancient Hebrews, who were needing to detach themselves from pagan practices of idol worship. For us today, the idols we must repudiate are not so much carved in wood or stone, but rather printed on a plastic card or carried in a designer bag. So, I asked, how do we interpret and apply the fifth commandment in New Zealand in the twenty-first century?

The bulk of the sermon was about what this commandment means for youngsters living at home ("Children obey your parents in the Lord" and for teenagers needing to individuate and discover their own values ("Fathers do not exasperate your children") I also spoke about how we might obey this injunction as our parents age, when in some cases the roles are reversed and we are called upon to house, clothe and maybe literally feed our mother or father. These decisions are not easy, for not all of us are physically or financially able to meet such requirements. I believe the commandment is about doing our best to ensure the need are met by someone, even if it is not ourselves. But this leaves a whole lot of room for martyrdom and manipulation and so we needed to talk about what this commandment doesn't mean.

Many books on Christian decision-making take the view that it is not the literal words of Scripture that guide us, so much as the character of the God revealed in the whole Bible, particularly as seen in the person of Jesus Christ. God is a god of tender compassion, yes, but he is also a God of clear boundaries and strong truth. So I needed to say very clearly to people on Sunday that honouring our parents does not mean tolerating or condoning incidences of violence, sexual abuse, criminality, exploitation, humiliation or coercion. I was aiming this word of discernment at adults, since the kids were already out at their own programmes, and especially at members who were sitting there thinking about parents past and present, who were just not worthy of the honour, respect and obedience the Bible lays out as the normal pattern of parent-child relationship and seniority. Perhaps it sounds dodgy for us to be deciding someone is unworthy, but I see it as parallel with the authority Scripture clearly gives the local church, to discern unacceptable theology or ethics, and to discipline members who are out of kilter with Christian principles. In the case of parents whose morals, ethics or relational style is toxic, leaving a legacy of pain and dysfunction, God does not ask us to honour such attitudes or actions.

This brings me back to the notion of a Word in season. There have been times when I have listened to a long story of abuse or cruelty, of appalling neglect or inordinate control, and ended up saying in all seriousness, "You are released from the responsibility to honour this parent." Although I would not claim to be a channel of the spiritual gift of prophecy on a weekly basis, I believe on these occasions I have spoken for God, bringing a prophetic word which speaks out the message God would have them hear. The response has always been an enormous relief and renewed sense of freedom on the part of the victim. I am not speaking here of the call to forgive, which is another subject altogether and has to do with forgoing the right to retaliate or wreak revenge. Withdrawing honour, on the other hand, is simply a means of setting a boundary of acceptability. It is based, for me, on the fruit of the Spirit we translate as goodness from the Greek agothosune and which means a strong word of truth when needed.

People accept a strong and freeing word like that from a minister because over centuries priests have been accorded the right to declare sins forgiven - the word of absolution. But theologically speaking, there is no reason to limit absolution or this kind of prophetic word to clergy. All of us as brothers and sisters in the Lord can speak a Spirit-led word of freedom and peace to a hurting believer. All of us can speak a word in season.

To Chew Over: Have you ever had the opportunity to speak a clear word of forgiveness or release to a fellow believer? Did you speak out? How did they respond?

Where the Spirit of the Lord is

There is joy and peace

Where the Spirit of the Lord is

There is free release

There is comfort in life's darkest hour

There's light and life and joy and power

In the Spirit, in the Spirit of the Lord.

© Stephen Adams